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The God Survey https://forums.knot4prophet.com/viewtopic.php?f=13&t=272 |
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Author: | Scar~ [ Mon Feb 22, 2010 1:29 pm ] |
Post subject: | The God Survey |
God Survey 1. How did you find out about your Deity? More than one is acceptable. ___ Newspaper ___ Bible ___ Torah ___ Book of Mormon ___ Koran ___ Divine inspiration ___ Tabloid ___ Burning shrubbery ___ Other (specify):________ 2. Which model Deity did you acquire?* ___ Yahweh ___ Father, Son & Holy Ghost [Trinity Pak] ___ Jehovah ___ Jesus ___ Krishna ___ Zeus and entourage [Olympus Pak] ___ Odin and entourage [Valhalla Pak] ___ Allah ___ Satan ___ God 1.0a (hairy thunderer) ___ God 1.0b (cosmic muffin) ___ None of the above; I was taken in by a false god 3. Did your Deity come to you undamaged, with all parts in good working order and with no obvious breakage or missing attributes? Please indicate all that apply: ___ Not eternal ___ Finite in space/Does not occupy or inhabit the entire cosmos ___ Not omniscient ___ Not omnipotent ___ Not infinitely plastic (incapable of being all things to all creations) ___ Permits sex outside of marriage ___ Prohibits sex outside of marriage ___ Makes mistakes (Pope Benedict, George Bush) ___ Makes or permits bad things to happen to good people ___ When beseeched, doesn't stay beseeched ___ Requires burnt offerings ___ Requires virgin sacrifices ___ Plays dice with the universe 4. What factors were relevant in your decision to acquire a Deity? Please check all that apply. ___ Indoctrinated by parents ___ Needed a reason to live ___ Indoctrinated by society ___ Needed focus in whom to despise ___ Imaginary friend grew up ___ Wanted to know Jesus in the Biblical sense ___ Graduated from the tooth fairy ___ Hate to think for myself ___ Wanted to meet girls/boys ___ Fear of death ___ Wanted to piss off parents ___ Needed a day away from work ___ Desperate need for certainty ___ Like organ music ___ Need to feel morally superior ___ Thought Jerry Falwell was cool ___ My shrubbery caught fire and told me to do it 5.In five lines or less, please describe what makes your Deity different than the rest.(be descriptive) ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________ *some gods were not included. |
Author: | Knot4Prophet [ Fri Feb 26, 2010 3:09 am ] |
Post subject: | Re: The God Survey |
Somehow my name was inadvertently omitted from the list of deities. Surely just an oversight. Excellent post, otherwise. Like any of them other gods are real. *scoffs* |
Author: | Scar~ [ Wed Mar 03, 2010 5:16 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: The God Survey |
Knot4Prophet wrote: Somehow my name was inadvertently omitted from the list of deities. Surely just an oversight. Excellent post, otherwise. Like any of them other gods are real. *scoffs* I felt a few infidels might respond, giving you an opportunity to smite them and curse them, raining down plagues and devastation upon them, killing their cattle and crops,...or...do nothing and let millions upon millions, nay, all mankind just think they were correct in their blasphemous ways, thereby allowing eternal damnation to be dispensed at your whim. |
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