Shut the hell up you two gay boys.

What did the Dyslexic, agnostic insomniac do?

Lay awake all night wondering if there really was a dog.

Go back to bed.

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what did the blind wanker say to the cunt who ate all pies with gangrene and leprosy say to the tossbag who seeps puss and farts and drips slime all over the shop and is deaf with ingrowing hairs? smell yer mothers crusty hole. Alright gnowm! if ever you get down to perth i have a job for you.

haha, look at my avatar. nice work eh!

FACT! 9 outta 10 ppl enjoy Gang Rape.

Here's one for ya Sprink--A man walks by a cafe and sees a sign that reads; Cheese sandwich-2.50 Ham and cheese-3.50 Handjob-5.00. He walks in and sits down. The waitress walks up and asks if he needs anything. He asks her, "Are you the one that is offering the handjobs?" She replies very seductively, "Why, yes, I am." He then says, "Go wash yer fucking hands. I want a ham and cheese."

Long time no type. How the hell are ya, you crusty sonofabitch?

Heh.

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Here's a small collection of rhymes to use the next time you're sitting around with friends and pints.

There was a young man of Bombay
Who fashioned a cunt out of clay
But the heat of his prick
Turned it into a brick
And chafed all his foreskin away

There was a young man of Peru
Who had nothing whatever to do
So he took out his carrot
And buggered his parrot
And sent the result to the zoo

There was a young man of Ostend
Whose wife caught him fucking her friend
"It's no use, my duck,
Interrupting our fuck,
For I'm damned if I draw before I spend."

There was a young man of Wood Green
Who tried to fart "God Save the Queen"
When he reached the soprano
He shot his guano
And his britches weren't fit to be seen

There was an old man of Connaught
Whose prick was remarkably short
When he got into bed
The old woman said,
"This isn't a prick, it's a wart."

There was a strong man of Drumrig,
Who one day did seven times frig,
He buggered three sailors,
Four Jews and two Tailors,
And ended by fucking a pig.

Here's a little ditty guaranteed to get you into some birds kacks on valentines day...

Roses are red...
Violets are blue...
I've got a big knife now get in the back of my fucking van.